Unraveling into the role of motherhood
When you're younger you think about what it's going to be like to have kids. I find that there's somewhat of this unrealistic expectation that everything will be, not easy, but simple enough that you will be able to handle it all. I thought like this before having children - I told myself my house would always be clean, I'd have the dishes done and food ready for my husband when he got home from work. (I sound like i'm a 1950's house wife don't I?) Well, reality kicks in REALLY FAST when you become a mother.
It's hard for me as a mom to let go of the little things. I'm the type of person who has always wanted to have control of things around me. It can be something as simple as Addison cleaning up her toys at the end of the night, but she puts them all back in the wrong spots. How crazy is that?! Shouldn't I be thrilled that my 19 month old daughter has learned to follow instruction and obey her parents when asked to clean up her mess? But no, my sinful self who demands that I have the control, will go and fix all of her toys once she's in bed to make sure they are in the exact proper spots, facing frontwards so all the labels are showing. I'll do this even before cooking dinner for my husband and I. I'm realizing as I grow into this role of motherhood that this isn't something that is healthy. I need to surrender my issues of control, my need for having everything just "perfect" to the Lord. Can any other Mama's out there relate? Do you find yourself obsessing over having a perfectly cleaned and decorated home? Is the need to always have the kids in the cutest outfit a necessity? If you are focusing on the little things more than the time you are spending with your children, then you need to stop, pray and surrender that to Jesus. He's there, ready and willing to take that from you and offer freedom in exchange. Don't miss out on your babies learning and growing, exploring and discovering life all around them because you're too busy stressing over the little things, that honestly, at the end of the day, mean nothing! What's of value is the time you put in with your children. What they are going to remember are the memories you make coloring, playing at the park, reading stories and cuddling on the couch. What they aren't going to care about is that they had the most adorable outfit on at age 2, the way your house looks, if the laundry was folded on time, if you had a gourmet meal every night for dinner or if their mom had their hair and makeup done each and every day.
Instead of holding onto the small things, I encourage you to live in the moment. Don't let these magical, special and joyful days with your little ones pass you by while you're stressed out over things that hold no value. These days are hard, but they are also the best days of your life. And let me tell you, they go fast! Am I perfect? Absolutely not! I still struggle with letting the small stuff go. But my desire is for my children to grow up seeing the fruits of the spirit displayed through me. I want them to see Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Gentleness, and Self Control through me by the way I interact with them, love on them and teach them.
Unraveling into the role of motherhood is a process of constant learning. I make mistakes daily. I ask for forgiveness when I do. I hope that when my children are adults they can look back at the memories I made with them and say "Those were some of the best times!".
"Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also,
and he praises her saying, Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all!
Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting;
But a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised".
Proverbs 31:28-30
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